The Furious Angels
FA Discussion => Off Topic => Topic started by: Eroz on May 31, 2005, 05:16:33 pm
-
Welcome to the world of random IRC chats, just click random or the Top 100 and enjoy. Favorites
<SteveTheNormalGuy> link plzzzzzzzzz
<SteveTheNormalGuy> wait, another z should do it
<MegamanX2K> x
<MegamanX2K> err
<MegamanX2K> damnit
* MegamanX2K cannot spell "z"
#449764 +(619)- [X]
TRAICOVN: so what is your address?
NightEyes: One moment
NightEyes: 68.35.199.208
TRAICOVN: ummmm
TRAICOVN: no, your real address....
TRAICOVN: like, where you live.
NightEyes: That is my real IP address!
TRAICOVN: 911 address.
NightEyes: I don't have local phone service
TRAICOVN: right.
TRAICOVN: but you have a house
TRAICOVN: that you live in
NightEyes: Oh, where I live?
TRAICOVN: if the RIAA subpoenaed you, what would be the address they would arrive at.
TRAICOVN: Right.
#38301 +(91)- [X]
<Max-> worse than shite 200mhz pentium with 32mb ram and monitors @ 60hz?
<CUI> Max- That's not computer
<CUI> That's a calculator
edit:
#538924 +(740)- [X]
quiksilvrr101: hello
axelay4: went out and bought some dice for D&D yesterday
quiksilvrr101: hot
axelay4: they were mondo expensive though...so i looked the guy at the counter straight in the face and asked him if i could roll a D20 to haggle
quiksilvrr101: lol
quiksilvrr101: and?
axelay4: goddamn natural 1
-
<Donut[AFK]> HEY EURAKARTE
<Donut[AFK]> INSULT
<Eurakarte> RETORT
<Donut[AFK]> COUNTER-RETORT
<Eurakarte> QUESTIONING OF SEXUAL PREFERENCE
<Donut[AFK]> SUGGESTION TO SHUT THE FUCK UP
<Eurakarte> NOTATION THAT YOU CREATE A VACUUM
<Donut[AFK]> RIPOSTE
<Donut[AFK]> ADDON RIPOSTE
<Eurakarte> COUNTER-RIPOSTE
<Donut[AFK]> COUNTER-COUNTER RIPOSTE
<Eurakarte> NONSENSICAL STATEMENT INVOLVING PLANKTON
<Miles_Prower> RESPONSE TO RANDOM STATEMENT AND THREAT TO BAN OPPOSING SIDES
<Eurakarte> WORDS OF PRAISE FOR FISHFOOD
<Miles_Prower> ACKNOWLEDGEMENT AND ACCEPTENCE OF TERMS
-
<[BAC]Draxon|TWL> "The animals will hear!" bellowed the ear licking penguin as the awesomely endowed midget sucked her oozing charlies and plugged his purple middle leg into her festering cunt.
<[BAC]Draxon|TWL> oops
<[BAC]Draxon|TWL> wrong window
<d|syztem> what the FUCK
Best Bash quote, Period.
-
Rofl
-
lol gotta love to wrong window messages. Sometimes they can be pretty funny.
-
A collection of favorites I have:
[whifflebat2000] Holy crap... this is incredible. Never played this level. Great atmosphere.
[Seppel] Whiff: Finally make it to level 3 on Super Mario Brothers?
<Zanthis(ALE)> AFK, tornado
(^I was there for that one!)
I've only seen this once before, couldn't believe it was on bash:
<Firefly> Time for my prayers:
<Firefly> Our Father, who 0wnz heaven, j00 r0ck!
<Firefly> May all 0ur base someday be belong to you!
<Firefly> May j00 0wn earth just like j00 0wn heaven.
<Firefly> Give us this day our warez, mp3z, and pr0n through a phat pipe.
<Firefly> And cut us some slack when we act like n00b lamerz, just as we teach n00bz when they act lame on us.
<Firefly> Please don't give us root access on some poor d00d'z box when we're too pissed off to think about what's right and wrong, and if you could keep the fbi off our backs, we'd appreciate it.
<Firefly> For j00 0wn r00t on all our b0x3s 4ever and ever, 4m3n.
<Raize> can you guys see what I type?
<vecna> no, raize
<Raize> How do I set it up so you can see it?
#75154
That's all for now. Keep em coming!
-
Oh man... i remember seeing this back in the day... it inspired me to do things like this to people myself... god i was such a dick back then... but damn it was funny as hell...
bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
BritneySpears14: Aight.
bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
bloodninja: Me too baby.
BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
BritneySpears14: Hey...
bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 chicken of the Infinite.
BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.
BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
bloodninja: Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of ****.
bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
bloodninja: Baby?
--------------
BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?
eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.
BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.
eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.
BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.
BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.
eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: What the f*ck, I told you not to message me again.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you f*ck up.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something
-
I read those before Venlar, your the one who made them?
This shows my nerd side. (And is this possible?)
#6130 +(248)- [X]
<nail|away> Packaging systems are lame. Tarballs are lamer.
So is source. I install me software with personally magnetized
needles and a steady hand.
Ummm.......Head Explodes
#142934 +(6011)- [X]
docsigma2000: jesus christ man
docsigma2000: my son is sooooooo dead
c8info: Why?
docsigma2000: hes been looking at internet web sites in fucking EUROPE
docsigma2000: HE IS SURFING LONG DISTANCE
docsigma2000: our fucking phone bill is gonna be nuts
c8info: Ooh, this is bad. Surfing long distance adds an extra $69.99 to your bill per hour.
docsigma2000: ...!!!!!! FUCK FUCK FUCK
docsigma2000: is there some plan we can sign up for???
docsigma2000: cuz theres some cool stuff in europe, but i dun wanna pauy that much
c8info: Sorry, no. There is no plan. you'll have to live with it.
docsigma2000: o well, i ccan live without europe intenet sites.
docsigma2000: but till i figure out how to block it hes sooooo dead
c8info: By the way, I'm from Europe, your chatting long distance.
** docsigma2000 has quit (Connection reset by peer)
-
nah i didnt make those... but i did do some of my own... i used to find my victims in the aol cyber rooms with one screen... and use a screen on aim to pull them into my trap... mwahahahaha... some funny stuff came out of that... i wish i saved those convo's
-
Whited out for the reason of alot of swear words.
#10372 +(3702)- [X]
#416857 +(3681)- [X]
<born1986> why the fuck isn't my disc drive working
<born1986> i fucking worked on that essay for three friggin' hours in school
<born1986> i now i cant finish it 'cos my fuckin drive ain't working
<Z00ass> you got the right drivers?
<born1986> hell yes
<born1986> it was working fine yesterday
<born1986> why does this shit always happen to me?
<Z00ass> maybe that little clip on the side is i nthe wrong position
<born1986> i havent touched it since school
<born1986> i'm growing impatient
<born1986> ANGRY even
<Z00ass> throw that shit out tha window
. . .
<born1986> OMG i fuckin did it!!!
<born1986> FUCK!!!!!
<Z00ass> it works?
<born1986> no, i threw it out the window
<Z00ass> the disk?
<born1986> NO the whole drive
<born1986> i live on the 6th floor, made a nice *smash*
<Z00ass> :D
<born1986> FUCK SHIT FUCK
<born1986> THE DISK WAS STILL INSIDE
<born1986> brb
. . .
<born1986> shit
<Z00ass> what? did ya break it?
<born1986> well i couldn't open the drive
<born1986> so i had to pound it against a rock
<Z00ass> :o
<born1986> quite HARD
<born1986> and you know what?
<born1986> that fucking disk wasnt even there
<Z00ass> ???
<born1986> i got so mad i threw the remaiders of the drive on to the freeway
<born1986> and when i got back upstairs i foud the disk inside my bag
<Z00ass> lol
<born1986> I NEVER EVEN PUT IT IN THE DRIVE
<born1986> i'm actually cryin right now
. . .
<born1986> wonder if i could make that drive work again
<born1986> brb
I was crying from all the laughing I was doing.
-
Manic had a funny one that made bash once, albeit he wasnt the one making the funny.
<ManicV> sleeping pills are for pussies
<proto_> No no no, you take these orally.
-
<Firefly> Time for my prayers:
<Firefly> Our Father, who 0wnz heaven, j00 r0ck!
<Firefly> May all 0ur base someday be belong to you!
<Firefly> May j00 0wn earth just like j00 0wn heaven.
<Firefly> Give us this day our warez, mp3z, and pr0n through a phat pipe.
<Firefly> And cut us some slack when we act like n00b lamerz, just as we teach n00bz when they act lame on us.
<Firefly> Please don't give us root access on some poor d00d'z box when we're too pissed off to think about what's right and wrong, and if you could keep the fbi off our backs, we'd appreciate it.
<Firefly> For j00 0wn r00t on all our b0x3s 4ever and ever, 4m3n.
this one seriously made me laugh so hard i was crying i counted 3 tears dripping down my face. non of those crappy tears that form up in your eyes i mean the ones that drip all the way down. that was the funniest thing i ever read it may just be that i am delirous right now or somthing but yeah....
-
some of the newer ones with potential
#510765 +(918)- [X]
<s3b`> Vegetto: /join #someonewhocares
<s3b`> Oh, look, the channel is empty
#507269 +(2318)- [X]
<acidwar> last night, tony and I decided to stop off on the way to the party to get some beer
<acidwar> we come out of the shop a few minutes later and there's a parking guy writing a ticket
<acidwar> tony goes up to him and asks him what the ticket's for, parking guy explains that the car is parked in a no standing zone
<acidwar> tony starts abusing him and tells him to cram it up his ass, so the guy writes a ticket for abusing him
<Nuzzler> haha
<acidwar> so tony gets up him even more, and every time he says something the guy writes another ticket
<acidwar> 14 tickets later, the guy gives up and walks off
<dendyh0> ...
<acidwar> and we both PISS ourselves laughing as we walk back to tony's car around the corner, leaving some poor bastard with 14 parking fines :D
<dendyh0> AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
<Nuzzler> ROFL!!
#500890 +(1731)- [X]
<Onizuka> ^captain_planet
* UB3R-B0T is now known as Kwame
<Kwame> EARTH
* Kwame is now known as Wheeler
<Wheeler> FIRE
* Wheeler is now known as Linka
<Linka> WIND
* Linka is now known as Gi
<Gi> WATER
* Gi was kicked by Xeiliex (Xeiliex)
* Gi has joined #jasio
* Gi is now known as Ma-ti
<Ma-ti> HEART
* Ma-ti is now known as Everyone
<Everyone> GO PLANET
* Everyone is now known as anonymous
<anonymous> BY YOUR POWERS COMBINED...
* anonymous is now known as Captain_Planet
<Captain_Planet> I AM CAPTAIN PLANET
<Moiph> YAAAAAY
<Xeiliex> Moiph, NEVER AGAIN
and im sorry. but this one is #1 for a reason
<Zybl0re> get up
<Zybl0re> get on up
<Zybl0re> get up
<Zybl0re> get on up
<phxl|paper> and DANCE
* nmp3bot dances :D-<
* nmp3bot dances :D|-<
* nmp3bot dances :D/-<
<[SA]HatfulOfHollow> i'm going to become rich and famous after i invent a device that allows you to stab people in the face over the internet
this one applies....
<AgentSmith> It seems you have been leading two lives, Mr. Anderson. In one life, you are Robert Anderson, assistant cook at a Jack in the Box in Mesquite....in the other...you go by the chat alias "Randerson"...spreading homosexual propoganda, lying, and being a generally immature pest...
<AgentSmith> One of these...has a future.
<Randerson> LMAO OMFG where's the phone, I have to tell Dean about this
<AgentSmith> How can you use the phone when you cannot...speak?
*** AgentSmith sets mode: +m
and this one is for the math geeks
#427792 +(2684)- [X]
<@Terror> "It's easy to forget what a sin is in the middle of a battlefield."
<@cky> opposite over hypotenuse
<@cky> dipshit
-
Whenever I read bash, as well as IRC in general, I always imagine actual people standing around talking as opposed to just reading words on the screen. That's why this one is my all time favorite, because I would love to see it happen in real life:
<TheOffspring326> Do you ever get the feeling that someone has mis-understood you?
<TheOffspring326> but you're not sure
<Motorbreath151> WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN, ASSHOLE?
-
<JonJonB> Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book
<JonJonB> Let's see the results...
<JonJonB> "Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.
<JonJonB> "Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything
<JonJonB> A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.
<JonJonB> "Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work."
<JonJonB> "Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. "
<JonJonB> Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls
<JonJonB> "Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"
<JonJonB> The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.
<JonJonB> He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.
<JonJonB> He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.
<JonJonB> Ok
<JonJonB> I have found, definitive proof
<JonJonB> that J.K Rowling is a dirty DIRTY woman, making a fool of us all
<JonJonB> "Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?
<melusine > O_______O
<JonJonB> Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang
<JonJonJonB> Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.
<JonJonJonB> 'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.
-
oh wait almost forgot this one. its a classic.
#120296 +(4290)- [X]
<link>once upon a midnight dreary, while i pron surfed, weak and weary, over many a strange and spurious site of ' hot xxx galore'. While i clicked my fav'rite bookmark, suddenly there came a warning, and my heart was filled with mourning, mourning for my dear amour, " 'Tis not possible!", i muttered, " give me back my free hardcore!"..... quoth the server, 404.
<hokage> *cries*, scary....
what a coincidence, i was just trolling thru bash.org yesterday, hadnt been on it and months, and poof, now this topic shows up.
-
My favorite of all time is this
<kittengirl>I luv guys where would they be wifout uz girls?
<goodbloke>Still in the Garden of Eden you gullible bitch
Classic
-
My favorite of all time is this
<kittengirl>I luv guys where would they be wifout uz girls?
<goodbloke>Still in the Garden of Eden you gullible bitch
Classic
ROFL
-
what ever happened to that post about p-p-p-powerbook, thats the best ever!
-
that wasnt a bash quote, just a funny tale
-
who the hell cares, still funny as hell
-
http://easynetworknyc.com/powerbook/
ttp://www.p-p-p-powerbook.com/images/g4%20resized/laser.jpg
-
This one has to be my favorite.
<turno> I want to fuck Michelle's brains out with my huge fucking cock, over and over again .. and then her sister can come and join us too.
<Seeker> Err turno, your mom reads the quotes on bash.org?
<turno> I'll fucking KILL YOU! !
<Seeker> Your mom does work for the church ? If she reads what you just said she'd be pretty angry right?
<turno> Dude you have no fucking clue, don't seriously... you'd be ruining my life.
<Seeker> Don't worry, I won't post it.
[Privmsg] <Seeker> Hey dude, I'm gonna paste something - will you post it on bash.org?
[Privmsg] <opiate> the turno thing? haha you fucking bastard!!
[Privmsg] <Seeker> hehe his mom's gonna fucking kill him, drag him to that church they go to and get the priest to sodomise him.
[Privmsg] <opiate> yeah and then he's gonna come fucking kill us, still I reckon it's worth it;)
[Privmsg] <turno> You're not gonna post it are you ? Please don't .. I'm begging you.
[Privmsg] <Seeker> I'm not gonna post it:) and even if I did she'd never know that your nick turno was her son Michael Savu .
[Privmsg] <turno> *phew* spose you have a point
But I just came across this one, and have to add it to this list.
Rabidplaybunny87: Okay, so my neighbors officially hate me
GarbageStan23: why?
Rabidplaybunny87: Well, me, david and andrew were having a bonfire in the backyard, and we were making s'mores and all... and suddenly we here sirens, and see a firetruck turn into the street in front of us.
Rabidplaybunny87: So we all went running to see what was up, and our neigbor's house was on fire!
GarbageStan23: oh shit!
Rabidplaybunny87: Yeah, and when we got there, the wife was crying into her husbands arms, and we were just kinda standing there, and then she saw us, and then like for 10 seconds, gave us the dirtiest look ever
Rabidplaybunny87: Turns out, we were still holding our sticks with marshmallows on it, watching the fire....
Rabidplaybunny87: talk about bad timing...
This is the last one... I swear...
SparTacus (rulimbaww@3B942731.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net) has joined #santcuary
*SparTacus is now known as Betty_Guns
wacko Jacko (lbeedy@1C57684.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net) has joined #santcuary
<wacko_Jacko>ok spartacus just came n here i know it. which one of you is that loser?
<hunney> I am spartacus
<ji_pper>no im spartacus
<Betty_Guns>I am spartacus
<mistr andersn>I’m spartacus
<wacko_Jacko>ur all freaks thats what u r
-
Can anyone dig up the cereal mascot one? I can't really be bothered, but it is bloody funny.
-
#75154 +(3620)- [X]
<Galactic> you know what's ALWAYS bothered me? cold cereal mascots
<Galactic> I mean that is just some FUCKED UP SHIT
<Galactic> the Trix rabbit, for example
<Galactic> I dunno man... if I were him I'd be fucking KILLING some kids
<Galactic> I remember a commercial where the fuckin rabbit WENT INTO A FUCKIN STORE AND BOUGHT A BOX OF TRIX WITH HIS OWN FUCKIN MONEY.
<Galactic> fuckin kids came outta NOWHERE and basically fuckin mug the poor stupid bitch rabbit
<Galactic> "silly rabbit Trix are for kids"
<Galactic> Fuckin rabbit just sits there and looks depressed.
<Galactic> FUCK NO that wouldn't fly with me
<Galactic> I'd have pimp-slapped EVERY ONE OF those fuckin bitches
<Galactic> and made them go get me the REST of a "complete breakfast" and eat Trix right in front of them bitches and THEN beat the shit out of them some more.
<Galactic> and wtf is with the disguises? All the dumb rabbit does is hide his ears and all of a sudden he's a fuckin kid?
<Galactic> I dunno about you, but if I SAW a 6 foot fuckin RABBIT with his ears tucked under a baseball cap, I wouldn't immediately think
<Galactic> "Hey, there's a cool lookin human kid, let me go over and share some of my cereal with him"
<Galactic> NO.
<Galactic> I'd be thinking
<Galactic> "that's a 6 foot fuckin RABBIT with his ears tucked under a baseball cap... what the FUCK was I just smoking?"
<Galactic> another thing... wtf is up with cereal being "A part of this complete breakfast"
<Galactic> last time -I- checked, cereal WAS breakfast
<Galactic> they show a big ass bowl of frosted flakes next to a waffle, a pancake, toast, a banana, a fuckin grapefruit... who the FUCK eats a breakfast that big
<Flaming_Duck> not me
<Flaming Duck> I don't even EAT breakfast nomore
<Flaming_Duck> I mean, I eat when I get up
<Flaming_Duck> but the whole thought "BREAKFAST IS ONLY SERVED UNTIL SUCH AND SUCH TIME"
<FLaming_Suck> bitch, you make my fucking sausage and egg sandwich when I pay you the fucking money
<Flaming_Duck> don't give me that shit.
<Galactic> Back to stupid cereal mascots...
<Galactic> Lucky Charms.
<Galactic> FUCKING LUCKY CHARMS
<Galactic> Lucky can turn the fucking MOON into a marshmallow, and he can't escape a bunch of fucking 6 year olds?!?!?
<Galactic> C'mon now, Lucky.
<Galactic> I KNOW your bitch ass has got to have a "Blow the fucking kids up" spell SOMEWHERE
<Galactic> or make "kid marshamllows" and EAT those bitches.
<Galactic> "They're after me Lucky Charms!"
<Galactic> ....
<Galactic> KILL THEM, BITCH!
<Galactic> I dunno why I went off on this rant here
<Galactic> it's just always bothered me."
-
<xterm> The problem with America is stupidity. I'm not saying there should be a capital punishment for stupidity, but why don't we just take the safety labels off of everything and let the problem solve itself?
That was the best one I ever read.
-
I just remembered this one.
<Clockstopper>If we put all the criminals in the world on some derelict continent, and then turned up like 50 years later, what do you reckon they would say?
<Bigape>G'day mate
-
all these quotes are way better when it is really late and your delirious. because I just woke up and I dont find as much humor in it :(
-
I'm going to post some quotes that involve me, and sometimes Adrenaline or Manic. If you're easily offended, don't read them.
My personal favorite...
<oddity_> I'm opening up the gamecube box, right?
<Grifter> right
<oddity_> and they have a bag with warning labels in, like, eight different languages
<Grifter> right
<oddity_> "you could choke on this."
<Grifter> i have the same warning on my dick
This quote was in our IRC channel during the elections when Manic and Adrenaline decided to run for President of IRC...
<Grifter> hey
<Grifter> d-ren has a running mate
<Grifter> I'd like to be manic's running mate
<Grifter> together we'll clean up IRC for the people!!
<dataw0lf> bah, you're so full of rhetoric.
<Grifter> hahah
<dataw0lf> what are you going to do for ME?
<Grifter> handjob
<dataw0lf> Ah, sweet.
<dataw0lf> You got my vote, buddy.
<Grifter> together we'll give handjobs to the people!!
Next...
<ManicV> i just reached into a bag of corn nuts when i meant to go for the sunflower seeds
<ManicV> it was really weird when i expected to taste sunflower seeds
<Grifter> damn, i wish my life was as exciting as yours
Next...
<Grifter> you know, there's a certain satisfaction a man can take when he has completed the consumption of a 16oz container of vanilla cake frosting
<Grifter> and now, I will be sick
<dedhed> heh
<Grifter> fuck, the ingredients on this icing are "Sugar, Vegatable Shortening"
<Grifter> my left arm just went numb
<Grifter> my chest hurts
<Grifter> i taste copper
<Grifter> gah!
And last, but certainly not least...
<Grifter> oh, it's funny, in a, i better laugh so the gnomes won't steal my brain, kinda way
<lola_> there are brain stealing gnomes?
<Grifter> duh!
<para_> yeah, you've got to watch out for the gnomes..they're evil
<lola_> I will never sleep again
<Grifter> come to my house, I'll keep you up, if you know what I'm sayin'
<Grifter> and i think you do
<proto> Ya, he has a nintendo.
<Grifter> booyah!!!
<lola_> you're going to give me a make over
<Grifter> well, there will be a facial
* kampfeh covers his mouth
<proto> OMG!
<proto> GRIFTER IS SOOOO NAUGHTY!
<Grifter> hahahaha
-
Ive got some as well, same applies, if easily offended, they might not be fot you. :)
<Adrenline> sweet, I just got the coolest email, Subject: Kinky Whores From Hell With No Inhibitions!
<proto> Oh good, I was worried i had the wrong address.
<eco> Lost is such a quality program.
<eco> Why can't all television programs be this good?
<Adrenline> because you touch yourself at night.
<Elimist> Ugh, that was a nightmare
<Elimist> Just invited a friend of mine onto an IRC channel I frequent
<eco> Did he tell everyone you were gay?
<eco> I do that to Tierra all the time
<eco> Hey everybody! Tierra is gay!
<eco> See.
<D-Ren> Elimist: first of all, we arent friends, second, stop inviting me to #littleboysandpriests
<ManicV> a few years ago at work, i was on hold for so long i forgot i was on hold
<ManicV> i just had a headset on, and the bastards weren't playing any music
<ManicV> ten minutes later i hear "how can i help you?"
<ManicV> scared seven shades of crap out of me
<dedhed> Did you almost catch your weiner, zipping up?
<ManicV> yeah
<ManicV> two men are on a boat, one named /hop the other named /quit. /hop jumps off the boat, who is left?
<-- zero_0 has quit (Quit: zero_0)
<[ManicV]> watching the simpsons and irc'ing on the comfiest bed in the quietest room in the house
<[ManicV]> i could die happy
<com4> shame you won't
<com4> you'll die alone and sad
<dedhed> Yeah
<dedhed> your mom did
<dedhed> But she quit before you got on
<tierra|h> that's who it was
<Adrenline> she got on. and got off!
<tierra|h> ^5
<tierra|h> wait...
<tierra|h> damnit!
<-- influx` has quit (TOMMY, NO!)
<Adrenline> I'll take "things said by pamela anderson before she called the cops" for $200 alex
<Adrenline> ugh. 45min to render 5 minutes of filler. what I wouldnt give for a rendering farm right now.
<OldSkoolS> your penis?
<Adrenline> hmm, maybe, but then again my penis can be put to good use while I wait
-
<AndrewB> I've played the Expansion Pack for about an hour and a half, and I'm already boAGH GET AWAY FROM ME YOU MOTH
I like this one because I have an insanely irrational fear of moths. I hate the fuckers and I have no idea why.
-
yeah, same with me and carnies, theyre just evil i tell you.
-
I hear they smell like cabbage as well.
-
*shudders*
-
I got bored last night.
<chibo> Found something pretty rad. $5 FBI hat purchased at HOPE. Blew past a cop at 85. Looked over at the cop, he read the hat, saluted, and retargeted someone else with the radar gun. Not too bad for $5. Highly recommended.
<@Lerou> Lag makes baby Jesus cry.
<@TempusRob> pssh
<@TempusRob> talk about lag
<@TempusRob> it took him 3 days to respawn
-
#538924 +(740)- [X]
quiksilvrr101: hello
axelay4: went out and bought some dice for D&D yesterday
quiksilvrr101: hot
axelay4: they were mondo expensive though...so i looked the guy at the counter straight in the face and asked him if i could roll a D20 to haggle
quiksilvrr101: lol
quiksilvrr101: and?
axelay4: goddamn natural 1
-
I dont get it...
-
Then you don't know D&D.
-
"Whoa! She's hot! Like, 10 hit dice hot!"
"I think I just rolled a critical fumble in my pants."